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To Sire, With Love
By Nadja Lee 21/06/00
English is not my
native language. Please forgive me my mistakes.
Disclaimer: “Angel”/
“BTVS” and all the characters here belong to the WB and probably a lot of other
people. Basically everyone one but me. I am just boring them for a while.
Pairing: Angel/Spike.
Summery: Spike thinks
about his relationship with Angel. Comparison piece to “ To Childe, With Love”
Archiving: ASK.
Feedback: Yes, please.
I would really like some feedback at this as it is my first try at
Angel/Spike. My e-mail address is neh@post10.tele.dk.
I always
watched him
Admired him
Wanted him
to notice me
Wanted his
attention
Anything
for him
Kissed the
sunlight
Reached for
the bloody stars
Who am I
kidding?
I would
still do that
If only he
would look at me
With love
in his eyes
When I
found him after all that time
My heart
was aching with joy
Until he
pushed me away
Like he
always do
Only this
was different
Before at
least I knew
That some
part of him liked me
What I did,
what I am
But no, not
anymore
In those
deep brown eyes
There was
only contempt
All hints
of kindness gone
I froze my
heart to him
Told myself
I didn’t care
Told myself
I hated him
But I know
I know that
I will always
Love him
I can’t
stop
He is
everything to me
I try to
make him go away
But this
power he has over me
This desire
I have to please him
Never stops
How I
convince the world that
I hate him
is beyond me
When I
can’t even convince myself
Even less
my heart
I hate
feeling this alone
This
abandoned
Damn, he
always does this to me
He always
leaves me
I would do
anything to make him
Smile one
smile at me
To say one
kind word
To kiss me
tenderly
But whom am
I kidding?
That will
never bloody happen
Whoever
said that a broken heart
Could heal
Have no
fucking clue what they were
Talking
about